The next few days……..
Most things were a blur at this time. I know that we saw people and I know that I tried to sleep though most of the time unsuccessfully. Fortunately, my body which was recovering from major surgery was actually doing well…whether that was reality or out of shock I am not sure. David and I spent time planning our daughter’s funeral instead of taking care of her…the natural thing to do in those first few days. We visited the funeral home to make arrangements and we picked out a grave site and grave marker. Karen and Nichole spent several hours trying to find a burial gown for Zoe because I could not bring myself to do that. What they found was perfect.
Most things were a blur at this time. I know that we saw people and I know that I tried to sleep though most of the time unsuccessfully. Fortunately, my body which was recovering from major surgery was actually doing well…whether that was reality or out of shock I am not sure. David and I spent time planning our daughter’s funeral instead of taking care of her…the natural thing to do in those first few days. We visited the funeral home to make arrangements and we picked out a grave site and grave marker. Karen and Nichole spent several hours trying to find a burial gown for Zoe because I could not bring myself to do that. What they found was perfect.
On September 19, 2009 at 5:30pm, we had a beautiful graveside memorial service for Zoe at Gardens of Memories. While getting ready for Zoe’s funeral, I will always remember how David expressed that he wanted to look nice for Zoe and how he felt that he was not only getting ready for her funeral but for her prom and her wedding and every other important event that he would not get to experience with her. About 200 friends and family were there. Even Dr. Donna (the neonatologist) and the nurse Debbie were there. Dr. Donna presented David and I with an amazing scrapbook of Zoe that will forever be a treasure to me. Jeff and Sarah provided the music, “Your Love” (one of Sarah’s songs) and “You Have a Maker”. Danny shared about his time with Zoe and gave our friends and extended family the opportunity to hear about Zoe
from his perspective. Nichole read a letter that I had written for Zoe. David shared a brief message entitled “the top 6 things I ever did to prepare for the most unpreparable thing I have ever faced”. Our Pastor, Ted Ewing shared some thoughts to close the service. He spoke about what to say and what not to say and he read some extremely fitting Psalms. It was a perfect service. David and I spent some time greeting our friends and family as they walked past Zoe’s closed casket. They commented on how beautiful she was from the pictures we had displayed.Many of the visitors joined us for a dinner that was organized for us at the Hotel Roberts in downtown Muncie. It was good to be able to visit with people and to just have the opportunity to break away from the intensity of what we had been feeling. Our church and our friend, JD really took care of us in regards to the dinner and finding a place large enough to host it (since we did not have a church building at that time). We truly truly appreciated the way they took care of our family.
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